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Original Political Toon

'Toon of the day:

1175 - 06/27/09

 



Joke of the day:

Late Night From 06/18 Part 1

"Not such a great day for Hillary Clinton. She fell down, broke her elbow. You know, Fox News is going to be all over this story. This proves the Democrats are weak. Reagan fell over 10 times, didn't even break his hair." --Craig Ferguson

"Now the official report said that Hillary fell while she was walking to her car in the parking lot of the State Department. But Hillary likes to exaggerate, so she's telling everybody it was sniper fire." --Craig Ferguson

"The Secret Service performed beautifully but they had to use the Jaws of Life to cut Hillary out of her pantsuit." --Craig Ferguson

"In his speech yesterday, former President George W. Bush attacked President Obama's policies on anti-terrorism, healthcare, and the economy. Then Bush spent the next 20 minutes trying to kill a fly." --Jimmy Fallon

"Big election news from Iran. A British newspaper reported that Mir Hossein Mousavi actually won the election and Ahmadinejad came in third. And coming in second, Al Gore. The guy can't win anything." --Jimmy Fallon

"Here's some good news. President Obama just appointed Tom Brokaw to his Commission on White House Fellowships, mostly because he loves to hear Brokaw try to pronounce fellowship." --Jimmy Fallon

"President Obama is getting a lot of criticism from PETA, you know, the Psychotics for the Ethical Treatment of Animals. They're taking issue with the fact that he killed a fly. For real. PETA said he should have captured the fly and taken it outside, which would have been a great message to send to North Korea." --Jimmy Kimmel

"I don't know how flies got on PETA's do not kill list, but they have. And I say let he who is without a stain on his windshield that used to be a moth cast the first stone." --Jimmy Kimmel

"The White House, though, doesn't like confrontation. You know, they like to work things out. So as a gesture of goodwill, they have relocated the fly's family to the Rose Garden, where they are now living on a fresh pile of Bo Obama's dog droppings. So that's nice." --Jimmy Kimmel

"If you haven't seen the video, it is pretty impressive. Reminds me of the time our previous president killed a worm with his tricycle." --Jimmy Kimmel

"Our secretary of state, Hillary Clinton, is in a cast. She fell and fractured her elbow. Fortunately, her scowl broke the fall, so she is okay." --Jimmy Kimmel

"Everyone at the White House is concerned about her, and to wish her well today, they flew a pantsuit at half mast." --Jimmy Kimmel

"Some massive protests continued today in Iran. Hundreds of thousands of people swarmed the streets to protest what they believe was election fraud in the re-election of President Mahmoud A Members Only Jacket." --Jimmy Kimmel

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